Re-Vision

Getting the words right, or seeing new possibilities

I consider myself a person open to change and new perspectives. My upcoming memoir is titled Subject to Change, after all. It’s about how I was fundamentally changed by a later-life career teaching science to teen moms, a career path totally off my radar until I just … did it. I knew my sudden move would lead to change, but I thought I would be the change agent.I would be the subject, not the object.

I had a writing teacher once who made a deliberate distinction between revision and re-vision. The first meaning a measure of rewriting and editing to get the details just right. The second meaning to see your project anew, to reimagine its purpose or its impact on the world.

Sometimes what develops requires re-visioning before we can learn from it. Sometimes opportunities or circumstances require a brand new image of what might happen. This has never been truer for me than it was when I entered the classroom and almost immediately got thrown to my knees by the understanding that I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. Ditto when I started writing memoirs about my experiences, first as a motherless daughter, and then as a teacher to teen moms.

During the first half of 2024, I submitted my newest manuscript to several dozen agents and editors without the response I’d hoped for. I’m now deliberating how to proceed. Facing the same scenario in 2021, I entered the Minerva Rising Press memoir contest. It was a long shot and a hasty decision, I thought, but I paid the entry fee, attached the full manuscript, clicked the “submit” button and forgot about it. I went back to writing stories about the teen moms in my classroom, already looking ahead to the next book.

About four months later, I was notified that I’d won the contest! I was ecstatic … until reality hit. If anyone was going to read my book, they’d have to first buy it. It would be up to me to make sure they did. The thought of marketing said book sounded about as exciting as treating hangnail.

I discovered a different perspective on book marketing. I’d re-visioned the process.

Mother of My Invention was published in November 2022. I spent the next year discussing the impact of mental illness on family members and the miserly and inadequate mental health resources in this country at speaking and signing events. After each event, the stories people shared—sometimes in whispers—about their experiences with mentally ill family members were heartbreaking. Readers felt I’d given them permission to tell their own difficult stories, and I was honored to hear them. I was surprised by the satisfaction these conversations gave me. It was the greatest reward I could have hoped for when I wrote the book. I discovered a different perspective on book marketing. I’d re-visioned the process.

With Subject to Change, I’ve been looking forward to having conversations with people about the challenges of teaching special populations such as teen moms and about the challenges pregnant teens face in completing their education. About teen pregnancy in general, especially in light of our current crisis in appropriate reproductive care for women of all ages.

I posted most recently about my publishing dilemma in “What Now?” What do I do with the edited, revised, and polished manuscript? In the three weeks since that last post, I toured the Canadian Rockies on a dream vacation, contracted and recovered from Covid, and was contacted by the commissioning editor for a niche publishing house. It’s traditional in the sense that they shoulder all expenses related to the publication and distribution of their books. Beyond that, it’s not standard at all. This is where my ability to alter my expectations and my vision might be tested.

Reimagining where a story is going is sometimes hard when I’m focused on getting the job done. I expected Subject to Change to follow my first book’s publishing path in many ways, though I never counted on a second contest win. I did enter a few manuscript contests, but without high hopes. Because really, you never know. Right?

All my dithering might be a moot point. The publisher hasn’t offered a contract, but they’ve made encouraging comments about the sample chapters I sent. I had a nice online conversation with the commissioning editor, who generously answered questions about their publishing model and what they expect from authors. She requested the full manuscript and a chapter summary, which I provided.

There’s no guarantee I’ll get an offer. It’s possible they’ll want more extensive changes than I’m willing to make. They may want to tailor my book to their niche audience in a way that doesn’t fit my story. I’m trying to re-vision my expectations, though; I want to be ready.

It’s my nature to approach the re-visioning of this project with curiosity.

I’m a firm believer in considering new circumstances or possibilities with curiosity. What if I were invited down this road? What might the landscape look like? These are the questions I’m considering. It’s my nature to approach the re-visioning of this project with curiosity.

I’m game. I’m subject to change if the change suits me.